Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Luca & Alia (the parentheses of our morning)

Our last outing to Cedar Lake this summer.

We just finished Skyping with Luca. We speak with him and my mom almost every day at 7 a.m. our time and 8 p.m. their time. He has just gotten out of the tub and is running around in all his naked glory sometimes. How did PAPs do this before Skype? I know there is always the phone, but it helps so much to see his face. Our conversations are pretty disjointed as he bounces around the room moving from one topic to the next while experimenting with the webcam - he likes to put his face really, really close to the camera and go "lalalalalalala." He likes to show us Mathilda, one of our cats, the only one who will let him pick her up. This morning he showed me one of his old bath toys - a water pump. One morning, he asked if Alia was awake and if he could see her. That got me kind of teary because he asked and I wish she was here. It doesn't really matter what is said or seen on these calls - just having a little Luca time feeds my soul.

It will be a long, long time before I will tire of his incessant chatter after returning home. It will be a long, long time before I tire of anything.

He is doing well. I think the first week was pretty tough for both my mom and Luca. He would cry because he missed us and take it out on my mom. One morning he told her she wasn't spreading the jam on his pancakes correctly . . . in fact, she "wasn't doing anything right." There were a few times that we called and he cried and didn't want to talk to us. That was probably the worst for me, but I totally understand. We are not there and he was sad.

But, now, he is in a routine and my mom has figured out how to do most everything "right." They have been very busy. In addition to having his regular 3 pancakes every morning :), he is going to kindergarten all day (8:20-2:45). He says he has a new friend - Elizabeth who has 2 ponytails (he says pony like the aunt from "The Pony Remark" episode of Seinfeld). He doesn't like working on his journal because he doesn't have the freedom he had in Pre-K where he could draw anything he wanted. He has to draw pictures of himself only. Last week he went to his friend Isabelle's house for a play date. I think he likes Melissa, Isabelle's mom, just as much as Isabelle. Luca and my mom went to visit Jean, my mother-in-law at her house in Hermann, MO, this past weekend. There he watched Over the Hedge, played with his Uncle Jeff, ate homemade macaroni and cheese and went on golf cart rides.

This week, he may see our friends Laura and Mariola (do you see a theme here with preferred friends?). He is also going to Grown-Up's Night Out at our Science Center. My step-father will probably visit as well.

Neighbors have checked in on my mom to see how she is doing. I am sure I am forgetting other wonderful acts of kindness. There have been so many. International adoption is really a group effort of people near and far - of strangers, friends & family. It is quite amazing, actually.

It's Luca in the early morning and Alia in the late morning - then, we wait for the next day. We are still in that liminal state - an in-between place with both our kids.

8 comments:

Jennifer said...

I see he has a way with the ladies, that's for sure. :-) I didn't hear of any Bob's or Paul's or Steve's.

I'm so glad he's settling into a routine. That must be a little weight off your shoulders. Doesn't help make you miss him any less, but at least you know he's keeping busy and having a generally good time, albeit missing you guys as much as you miss him.

So how long do you think it will take Merriam-Webster to acknowledge 'Skype,' 'to skype,' and 'skyping?' :-)

Susan said...

Go Luca and his "girls"! I am so glad to hear that he is doing well, and YOU TOO!
I know it is hard to be without him, but although difficult, I think it's sometimes "good" for kids, and adults, to go away for a time because it really makes you re-appreciate each other!

I love skype, for sure. We don't video cam with Joe, we have no webcam at home, (it's in kaz) but just comforting to talk to him at least twice a day.
I'm already thinking about what is going to happen in a couple weeks when Joe and Sean leave. I will be sad, i am sure, but also...it will be in the "waiting period" for Leeza, and THAT makes it all worthwihle.

Luca is such a cute, smart, wonderful lil boy. You are such an amazing momma...and I cannot wait to follow the stories of Alia and Luca together!

I'm glad your mom figured how to do the jam right. :)
LOL
I saw a little boy, about 4 today, with his mom at lunch, they were having dessert together. It reminded me of me and "little Sean" back in the day.......before the eye rolls and the 'you are so embarrassing mom" stuff started. HA HA

I am glad Luca is having fun, that should give you peace, and time to get to know your lil munchkin Alia and prepare her for her chattering brother. :)

Tracy said...

He is a cutie...

I am sure you really miss him something terrible. I am glad that you know how to get the skype working. I will need to figure out the video part before we leave on our adventure. I can't imagine not seeing my kids for so long.

I am glad he is doing alright now. You have a wonderful mom to come stay with him in your absence.
Tracy

Kim said...

I can't imagine having to concentrate on one child while missing the other one so deeply. I don't know how I will manage in a few (?) months but it will have to be done. I am glad you are able to Skype with him. I have no idea what this is but I will definitely look into it.

Glad to read Luca is adjusting to the time with your Mom.

Kim

Karen said...

Because my laptop was stolen I missed out on Skype (and the ability to blog, check emails and dowload photos whenever the urge hit). Thank goodness I didn't have a husband or little one at home (that would've been awful).

Sounds like Luca is having a ball, bouncing around the room seeing his mommy and daddy on the small screen. And to have such caring neighbors check in every so often is such a blessing. Then there's your mom who's will do anything for her grandson and granddaughter. It takes a village to adopt a child.

All is good in your world.

Monica said...

Oh gosh that post just really made me CRY big crocodile tears. I'm far from getting a referral yet or needing to think about traveling away from our other children but I know it's going to be SO hard on all of us when that day comes Your description of the experience is hard to think about. I'm glad that Luca is doing better with your Mom now and that you have Skype to ease your need. Wishing I could speed up time to get you to the place where you have both children at home together with you!

Alysa said...

Luca seems to be adapting fine and charming all the girls! He is such a cutie pie! I'm glad your webcam works -- technology can be a wonderful thing!

Anonymous said...

You got it right that international adoption is a group process. What would we do without each other?

So glad it's going well...
Shannon