The Home Study is DONE!

Continuing to feel really sappy . . .

I can't help it! The leaves are starting to turn here and I realized that (MAYBE) when I see them again we will have our DAUGHTER home with us!


The Good, the Bad and the Ugly

Our home study is complete and was sent off to USCIS (Immigration) this week. That is the last piece of paperwork the government needs to approve our application to adopt internationally. The form we will receive is called the I171 and it is an important part of our dossier. We also received letters from our employer and Apostilled marriage licenses this week. I had some bloodwork done as well. The medical part seems complicated because we have to have some blood tests, then the doctor has to fill out the paperwork and we have to have it notarized in the office.

As anyone who has been through adoption will tell you, you can't expect a completely smooth process. We did hit a couple of glitches this week. I also sent my birth certificate to Indiana to get Apostilled and it was returned with a note attached explaining that they don't Apostille birth certificates issued by COUNTIES, only the STATE. My mother nicely picked up a stack of birth certificates for me this summer, yet they cannot be Apostilled. So, I had to request STATE birth certificates through vitalcheck.com. After all was said and done (express mail, birth certificates, and other mystery fees), we paid $43.45 for 2 Apostilled Indiana STATE birth certificates. I would have never seem this one coming, but as I wrote, not a huge deal. We received our letter from our mortgage company, but have to re-request that because the notary's license expires at the end of January. Ideally, they want any notary's license to be good for at least a year after s/he signs the document. This is tough to request - to have something notarized by someone whose notary does not expire for a year. And I realized that I need MORE bloodwork done for the medical exam. I have been to the doctor once a week for the last month or so. I think her nurse is getting tired of my messages!

One of the last pieces

Tomorrow I am going to the bank to get the reference letter from them. That is one of the last pieces of paper I have to request. Everything else is in the works.

So, we continue to eat that elephant one bite at a time . . . one bite.

Apostille

Making Progress
Here is an Apostille! This one is attached to our FBI background checks. An Apostille is basically an international notary. Practically every document that goes into our dossier has to be Apostilled - so far we have gotten this one, Scott's birth certificate and our adoption agency's license. Paperwork - exciting stuff! This last week I requested letters from our employer and mortgage company. Almost everything else is in process. We have to finish our medical tests and request a letter from our bank. So, we are still moving and are (hopefully!) on target.

MARCH?!
I spoke with our adoption coordinator on Friday. I told her that we haven't bought any clothes for "Saskia" yet and she could not believe that I have been able to control myself. She said that we could expect to travel in March/April, so I could buy something for the summer. Now, I am getting butterflies! March/April - that is not that far away. The process has really flown by so far. I am sure waiting for our travel dates and letter of invitation from the Kazakhstan government slows time down quite a bit.

Peace
I have also gotten a bit reflective about adoption - about having the 2nd child that we have longed for for the past 3 years. We have experienced multiple losses - neonatal death and subsequent miscarriages - and it is hard to believe that this difficult road is coming to an end. And, at the end of the road is a living child. I have started to feel a great sense of anticipation and relief that the family we have envisioned for ourselves is actually going to be a reality. That has been a difficult thing for me to believe after so much heartache and loss. So, as all this is coming together I am actually feeling a sense of peace that has eluded me since we lost Hope, Meret and Annalisa more than 2 years ago.

Another dossier?
It is hard to believe that a family could be working on more than one dossier in the same month, let alone a lifetime, but we have been! It seems like we should be working for the CIA. Scott submitted his dossier for tenure to his department on Friday! He has worked so very hard and I am so proud of all he has done. It is amazing to flip through the dossier and see all that he has accomplished! So, send good thoughts our way for tenure approval AND adoption.

Throwing problems in the trash can
So, I cannot help posting the exchange Scott just had with Luca. Luca loves toy cars about as much as he loves planets. He plays with them everyday . . . and everyday there is some tension surrounding him putting all the cars away at night. Luca asked to get his cars out and Scott said maybe he shouldn't today because he has problems putting them away at night. He protested and whined and then walked over to the trash can, opened it and said "I am throwing away my problem putting my cars away, so now I don't have it. Now I will get my cars out." How can you even begin to argue with THAT? I am inspired to literally throw my problems in the trash. It probably feels pretty good.

Until next week . . .

Quick Update

We had our last home study visit last Friday, so we are all done with that. It seems like we "passed." Thanks to those who wrote recommendations for us. Our social worker said, "They all think you are great!" We told her we wanted to have our dossier in by the end of October and she said that seems reasonable.

Now comes the fun part . . . gathering the rest of the multitude of documents we need! We have waited to do this because Kazakhstan is adamant about the documents being less than 3 months old when we submit our dossier.

So, not a lot to report . . . more paperwork gathering.

Fingerprints

Both Scott and I have been fingerprinted 3 times - twice the old-fashioned way and once digitally. We went to USCIS in St. Louis Friday morning for the digital prints. I am trying to think of how to explain how odd all of this is. I'm not sure how to put it into words. Fingerprints; physicals; a home study, letters from our bank, mortgage company and employers; passports - I guess it is hard to see a baby at the end of all of this paperwork and travel. I know it happens. I look at others' blogs often to prove that to myself. I guess "surreal" is the best word to use to describe the process.

Scott received his passport today - the post office delivered it on Sunday. We received it in less than the month that was promised by the government. Perhaps this is a good omen. "So far so good" I keep telling myself.

We seem to be in a holding pattern otherwise . . . just waiting for the last home study visit in a little less than 2 weeks.

In non-adoption news, Scott and I started school last week and Luca starts Pre-K tomorrow. I am actually grateful for the structure school provides for all of us. It makes me much more efficient. I am, at the same time, sad to say good-bye to summer. I know that in a few years, Luca will be off doing activities or hanging out with his friends. I try to treasure every moment we have together. He seems really excited to be going back to school. This year he will be in Ms. Jackson's Star classroom. The fact that he will be a "star" (he was a frog last year) is reason enough for him to celebrate because, as you may know, he LOVES space.

We took him to a party last night and his conversation starter was to thrust a Ziploc bag full of Matchbox cars at whoever would talk to him and name each of the cars and say that "some of the cars are old and a few are new." He can be a little shy - it seems that props help!

Until next week . . .

Where will Saskia come from?

See Kazakhstan? It is right there below Russia. Apparently, there is a documentary called "Long Way Round" featuring Ewan McGregor's (Star Wars fame) around the world motorcycle trip that includes a good amount of Kazakhstan. I have not seen it yet, but it sounds like a good introduction to the country.

I don't have a lot to report this week. We have an appointment to get our fingerprints done at the USCIS (U.S. Citizen and Immigration Service) a week from today. This is for our petition to adopt a foreign orphan (I-600A). I think the document basically gives us permission to conduct an international adoption. We have our home visit with our social worker scheduled for 2 weeks from today. That will be our last visit with her.

I am trying to wrap my brain around timing because when we submit all of our paperwork, nothing can be older than 3 months. We have to time the whole thing according to when we think we will receive the government documents, but we can't receive the government documents until we finish the home study and we can't finish the home study until we acquire some time senstive documents from our mortgage company, etc. Does your head hurt yet? Mine has for a few days! I would ask our social worker to clarify but I haven't even figured out what questions I need to ask! I think I need to map this whole thing out on paper. Maybe it will make sense then . . . or not!

Saskia?

Luca really is excited about having a baby sister from Kazakhstan. Maybe he thinks she will take some of the heat off of him. Can you imagine a minimum of 2 sets of eyes looking at you while you do everything? Maybe he needs some company for Pete's sake. You can talk to cats and adults for only so long, you know!

So, why is this post titled Saskia? Because we asked Luca what he wanted to name his baby sister a few weeks ago and, without blinking an eye, he said "Satsia." At least, that was what it sounded like to us! And, for the last few weeks we have been chuckling about this . . . "how did he come up with that name?" and "it sounds so Russian!" Well, Scott figured out the mystery. He was reading a book about the artist Rembrandt to Luca the other night. Rembrandt's 2nd wife was named Saskia (see above for a portrait of Rembrandt & Saskia having a good time) . . . that explains it! So, baby Saskia it is! Although, I cannot say that we will actually name the child this - we have some other names in mind - but it is good to have a working name and a name connected with Rembrandt, no less.

So, our quest for Saskia continues. We had visit #2 with our social worker on Friday. At this visit, Scott and I spoke with the social worker individually about our self-study (aka life stories). The next (and last) visit she will come down here to see our home. I plan to schedule that for the end of August. After all the visits and the background checks and the TB tests, she will write up a report that (hopefully!) reassures the Kazakhstan government that we are good parents!

Here is a site with links to blogs written by families who have adopted from Kazakhstan. They are arranged by city/region the child(ren) was adopted from. http://www.kazakhadoptivefamilies.com/families.html

Our boy is going to be 4 next weekend . . . so hard to believe! Here he is doing some experimental painting:

That is about it for now!

Home Study

People who are pregnant post ultrasound pictures, people that adopt post maps! Yesterday we went up to Edwardsville for our first home study meeting. We were pretty nervous, but someone who has already been through the process reassured us that it would be okay. And it was. We think it went well. Luca helped our cause by telling the social worker about all the planets, including Sedna, and getting upset when it was suggested that Pluto is a now minor planet. He once told me that when he grows up he is going to make Pluto bigger so it can be a planet again. Perhaps! The social worker gave us more forms - surprise! - and asked us some questions about adoption, parenting and how we will make this child part of our life. I liked answering these questions and thinking about the things we will do to make her a part of our family and teach her about her culture and ours at the same time.

As Scott said, this is getting more real every day. It is so exciting to think about our little girl out there somewhere.

We had to convince Luca that we weren't actually picking up "the baby girl" in "Kaz - nik - stan" yesterday. He was sure of it. We had lunch in Edwardsville and he told the waitress that that was what were were doing after lunch. You should have seen the waitress's face!

So, we meet the social worker 2 more times. We go up there again and she will interview us individually and then she will come down her to see us in our element. We also have to send a number of forms to her - like financial statements & medical reports - and get fingerprinted for background checks from the state of Illinois and the FBI. I want to get all of this done ASAP because we have to get the home study done before anything else can happen.

I am going to try to post some links to blogs/websites set up by those who have or are adopting from Kazakhstan. These provide great inspiration to us!